things that are pointless and/or stupid...

changing from my usual paragraph form rant, this will be a list of things that i find stupid and/or pointless.. if you make the list, i apologize, but it just means i don't like you very much.. no offense..

- wearing sunglasses indoors
- overweight girls wearing belly shirts
- crotchless underwear
- the metric system
- flavored condoms
- chains on wallets
- old people putting on their blinkers (may or may not turn for the next 15 blocks)
- anyone over the age of 15 bringing a glove to a baseball game (really?)
- Paris Hilton
- "Baby on Board" stickers in your car window
- lesbians using dildos (might as well mix in a real penis at this point, right?)
- Ja Rule
- bodybuilders (back acne, 'roid rage, heart problems and shrunken testicles? cool!)
- Vermont
- security tape on Cd's and DVDs
- Britney Spears wearing underwear
- toupees/comb-overs
- traffic laws in Massachusetts
- guys at baseball games behind home plate talking on their cell phone and waving
- yelling "get in the hole!" on the tee shot of a par 5
- soft core porn
- mustaches
- non-alcoholic beer
- auto faucets (how many hands do i have to put under the damn thing for it to work? cause i only have 2 and that's not getting it done)
- auto hand dryers (step 1: put hands under nozzle and rub hands together briskly.. step 2: wipe hands on pants)
- wearing socks with sandals
- Celine Dion
- soccer
- going to strip clubs sober (girls taking their clothes off and acting like they're doing it for me and enjoying it is laugh-out-loud comical, not believable... i need beer to brainwash me)
- Christmas without snow
- Kim Kardashian doing anything but posing nude
- baseball's all-time home run record
- arguing about political views
- male cheerleaders (yes, i know that you're touching her butt once every quarter.. you're still wearing a leotard and cheering for the real athletes who are fucking the cheerleaders after the game.. you had a nice run)
- phrases like "no offense" or "no disrespect" (someones about to be offended or disrespected)
- lipstick (no need, looks weird)
- fanny packs
- girls faking orgasms (we'd rather you tell us what you want to get a real orgasm, sounds much better, right?)
- Lindsay Lohan going to rehab (18Th time's the charm?)
- "Laguna Beach" after Season 2
- anything Roger Clemens has done, including Mindy McCready
- Flava Flav
- going on "Real World" with a boy/girlfriend at home
- any white rapper other than Eminem
- washing your Big Mac down with a Diet Pepsi
- Jehovah witnesses ("ya know, i was just thinking about switching religions while i was eating supper with my family, i'm glad you stopped by".. idiots)
- cell phone kiosks in the mall (has anyone ever bought one?)
- Nascar (cool, Tony or Dale or Cletus or Bubba just turned left again really fast)
- guys frosting their tips
- the combination of actress/singers or actor/singers... you suck at both, go be a greeter at Walmart
- breast reduction (if your back doesn't hurt, they're fine)
- being rude to the servers for a problem with your food (they didn't cook it so be a polite grown up about it)
- making out NOT leading to sex (it's like warming up the pitcher and not putting him in the game.. plus our balls hurt then, crowd hating that)
- PETA
- asking boxers who the best boxer in the world is.... it's always them
- Ashlee Simpson doing anything but conceiving my child
- Joey Potter becoming Mrs. Tom Cruise
- being racist or sexist or anything "ist" (it's 2008, about time we figure that out)
- Westboro baptist church
- drunk-dialing exes or current crushes
- talking about your past personal athletic achievements from 5 to 10 to 20 years ago ("wow, that's really interesting" Sincerely, Absolutely Nobody... team achievements are always solid, keep 'em coming... maybe it's because i have very few personal athletic achievements? ha..)
- weekend mornings
- stealing with a 5 or more run lead in the 7Th inning or later
- pick-up lines
- spinach (besides Popeye, who eats this?)
- sudoku
- trying to decide what is looser, Oprah's sweatpants or Britney's vagina...
- wearing jeans and/or hats at the gym
- erasable ink
- bow ties

well i think i've run out, feel free to add your own in a comment.. i know my roommates will probably say "blogging" and they have a point.. if i think of any more i'll add them on..